Over 18s jokes - post here

kevinchess1 · Post by **kevinchess1** » Wed Jan 11 2017 7:28pm

I'm sick of people knocking on my door begging.
There's just been a woman asking for donations for a sperm bank.
I gave her a right mouthful!

kevinchess1 · Post by **kevinchess1** » Sat Jan 14 2017 11:44pm

I was standing, naked, in front of the mirror, admiring my 6 pack
Started getting warm, so I put it back in the fridge

kevinchess1 · Post by **kevinchess1** » Mon Jan 16 2017 7:31pm

I came home to find my wife horny!

She said "Tie me to the bed and do anything you want!"

So I tied her up and went back to the pub.

Mel · Post by **Mel** » Mon Jan 16 2017 10:34pm

kevinchess1 wrote: So I tied her up and went back to the pub.

Which is where you got the joke from?

kevinchess1 · Post by **kevinchess1** » Tue Jan 17 2017 8:34pm

I'm not sure Luke gets role play
he was the plumber, she was the poor lonely housewife who couldn't pay her bill...
He took her to the Small Claims court

kevinchess1 · Post by **kevinchess1** » Thu Jan 19 2017 11:17pm

Koreans have recently brought out their own vegetarian version of an instant noodle snack.

It's called Not Poodle.

kevinchess1 · Post by **kevinchess1** » Fri Jan 20 2017 2:10pm

I'm not sure Luke gets role play
She was the student who was desperate for an 'A'
he was the teacher
'wait' she said 'Where are you going?'
'I've got marking to do.'
'Just a second...I want you to know i'd do ANYTHING to get an A.'
'Really? well there is one thing you can do to guarantee that.'
'What that?' she asked breathlessly.
Luke lean over and whispered in her ear 'Study!'

kevinchess1 · Post by **kevinchess1** » Mon Jan 23 2017 8:06pm

My wife slipped into something that made me smile?"

A coma

kevinchess1 · Post by **kevinchess1** » Tue Jan 24 2017 2:02pm

I think The most common surname in China is Chang, correct me if you think it's Wong.

kevinchess1 · Post by **kevinchess1** » Thu Jan 26 2017 9:46pm

Luke to Dr: I’ve hurt my penis in a surfing accident

Dr: Did you fall off your board

Luke 'No I slammed my laptop shut when the wife walked in

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