Christmas jokes 2019

The light-hearted side of life
kevinchess1
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Re: Christmas jokes 2019

Post by kevinchess1 » Mon Dec 16, 2019 10:30 pm

Does anyone know how long a turkey supposed to last in the freezer?
Cause I put mine in yesterday and it’s already dead!
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Re: Christmas jokes 2019

Post by kevinchess1 » Wed Dec 18, 2019 5:25 am

As it’s Christmas, I took the family to Lapland
It was good because they don’t usually let children into those type of places
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Re: Christmas jokes 2019

Post by kevinchess1 » Sat Dec 21, 2019 7:14 am

IDSIS has been leaving jewellery catalogues all over the house. So, I've taken the hint...

Got her a magazine rack for Christmas!
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Re: Christmas jokes 2019

Post by kevinchess1 » Sat Dec 21, 2019 10:13 pm

I'm off to my works Christmas do at the urology department. :)

It's bring a bottle. :thumbup:
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Re: Christmas jokes 2019

Post by kevinchess1 » Mon Dec 23, 2019 8:41 pm

Taichung ‘Can you buy me some toilet rolls when you’re at the shops?’
Expresso ‘Can’t you wait until you’ve opened your Christmas presents?’
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Re: Christmas jokes 2019

Post by kevinchess1 » Tue Dec 24, 2019 9:17 am

Ah bless him
Chadwick brought me a present to show me the true meaning of Christmas :thumbup:

A dictionary :?
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Re: Christmas jokes 2019

Post by Chadwick » Tue Dec 24, 2019 1:23 pm

kevinchess1 wrote:
Mon Dec 02, 2019 5:12 pm
You all know how this works
I'll start with the traditional
Q. How does Good King Wencelas like his pizza :?:

(Chadwick that's your cue :thumbup: )
Deep pan, crisp and even!
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Re: Christmas jokes 2019

Post by kevinchess1 » Tue Dec 24, 2019 9:00 pm

'Happy Christmas Nige, here's your knighthood.'
'Thanks Boris.' :thumbup:
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Re: Christmas jokes 2019

Post by kevinchess1 » Tue Dec 24, 2019 10:45 pm

Q. How does Fathers Christmas keep his hands clean?
A. Santasizer
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Re: Christmas jokes 2019

Post by kevinchess1 » Tue Dec 24, 2019 11:48 pm

Forget the past, you can’t change it
Forget the future, you can’t predict it
Forget the present, I didn’t get you one
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