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Re: Clean jokes - post 'em here

Posted: Thu Jul 15 2021 9:47am
by expressman33
I want to tell you about a girl that only eats plants.
You've probably never heard of herbivore.

Re: Clean jokes - post 'em here

Posted: Thu Jul 15 2021 3:28pm
by expressman33
I got a Bonnie Tyler sat nav, it kept saying ‘turn around’ and every now and then it falls apart!

Re: Clean jokes - post 'em here

Posted: Thu Jul 15 2021 4:02pm
by macliam
expressman33 wrote:
Thu Jul 15 2021 3:28pm
I got a Bonnie Tyler sat nav, it kept saying ‘turn around’ and every now and then it falls apart!
Sounds like the driver in the US
Cop "Turn Around"
Driver "Every now and then, I get a little bit lonely and you're never coming round"
Cop "Turn Around"
Driver "Every now and then, I get a little bit tired of listening to....."
Gets tasered :shock:

Re: Clean jokes - post 'em here

Posted: Sat Jul 17 2021 1:26pm
by expressman33
Why shouldn’t you write with a broken pencil? Because it’s pointless

Re: Clean jokes - post 'em here

Posted: Sat Jul 17 2021 1:27pm
by expressman33
What do you call bears with no ears?
B

Re: Clean jokes - post 'em here

Posted: Sat Jul 17 2021 10:01pm
by kevinchess1
Who likes Roman numerals ?
I for one.

Re: Clean jokes - post 'em here

Posted: Tue Jul 20 2021 2:33pm
by expressman33
There’s a fine line between a numerator and a denominator. (…Only a fraction of people will get this clean joke.)

Re: Clean jokes - post 'em here

Posted: Tue Jul 20 2021 2:33pm
by expressman33
When does a joke become a ‘dad’ joke?

When it becomes apparent.

Re: Clean jokes - post 'em here

Posted: Thu Jul 22 2021 10:57pm
by expressman33
It's a 5 minute walk from my house to the pub.
It's a 45 minute walk from the pub to my house.
The difference is staggering.

Re: Clean jokes - post 'em here

Posted: Fri Jul 23 2021 10:44am
by macliam
It's Olympics time!

Why didn't Mexico win many medals at the Olympics?

Because their best runners and swimmers are in the USA.....