The laugh I desperately need at the moment

The light-hearted side of life
blythburgh
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The laugh I desperately need at the moment

Post by blythburgh » Thu Jun 10 2021 8:55am

I got this sent to me on FB and that person got it from "The Beach is My Happy Place":

THESE ARE ACTUAL COMPLAINTS RECEIVED BY "THOMAS COOK VACATIONS" FROM DISSATISFIED CUSTOMERS:
1. "They should not allow topless sunbathing on the beach. It was very distracting for my husband who just wanted to relax."
2. "On my holiday to Goa in India, I was disgusted to find that almost every restaurant served curry. I don't like spicy food."
3. "We went on holiday to Spain and had a problem with the taxi drivers as they were all Spanish."
4. "We booked an excursion to a water park but no-one told us we had to bring our own swimsuits and towels. We assumed it would be included in the price."
5. "The beach was too sandy. We had to clean everything when we returned to our room."
6. "We found the sand was not like the sand in the brochure. Your brochure shows the sand as white but it was more yellow."
7. "It's lazy of the local shopkeepers in Puerto Vallartato close in the afternoons. I often needed to buy things during 'siesta' time -- this should be banned."
8. "No-one told us there would be fish in the water. The children were scared."
9. "Although the brochure said that there was a fully equipped kitchen, there was no egg-slicer in the drawers."
10. "I think it should be explained in the brochure that the local convenience store does not sell proper biscuits like custard creams or ginger nuts."
11. "The roads were uneven and bumpy, so we could not read the local guide book during the bus ride to the resort. Because of this, we were unaware of many things that would have made our holiday more fun."
12. "It took us nine hours to fly home from Jamaica to England. It took the Americans only three hours to get home. This seems unfair."
13. "I compared the size of our one-bedroom suite to our friends' three-bedroom and ours was significantly smaller."
14. "The brochure stated: 'No hairdressers at the resort.' We're trainee hairdressers and we think they knew and made us wait longer for service."
15. "When we were in Spain, there were too many Spanish people there. The receptionist spoke Spanish, the food was Spanish. No one told us that there would be so many foreigners."
16. "We had to line up outside to catch the boat and there was no air-conditioning."
17. "It is your duty as a tour operator to advise us of noisy or unruly guests before we travel."
18. "I was bitten by a mosquito. The brochure did not mention mosquitoes."
19. "My fiancée and I requested twin-beds when we booked, but instead we were placed in a room with a king bed. We now hold you responsible and want to be re-reimbursed for the fact that I became pregnant. This would not have happened if you had put us in the room that we booked."
Source: Peter Dickinson
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Keep smiling because the light at the end of someone's tunnel may be you, Ron Cheneler

macliam
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Re: The laugh I desperately need at the moment

Post by macliam » Thu Jun 10 2021 9:47am

Whether or not they are true, they certainly could be.

I remember being in a hotel in Tangier when an English matron loudly complained about the Moroccan music being played in the reception area.... "I didn't come all the way here to listen to that rubbish" :roll:

The same lady dad an issue with the flatbreads....... they just didn't look like bread - and there was no butter!!

But the best was when she finally collared the manager to inform him of his failings. As he made every attempt to remain polite, she exploded "Just because you look like a terrorist, there's no need to act like one!

I couldn't help wondering why she was in Tangier to begin with...... I was only passing through, but it seemed she was booked for a fortnight. I also wonder whether she survived to get her flight home!
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Just because I'm paranoid, it doesn't mean they're not out to get me

blythburgh
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Re: The laugh I desperately need at the moment

Post by blythburgh » Thu Jun 10 2021 10:26am

many years ago friends of 'im indoors parents went to Belgium with them. The meal arrived and slowly but loudly the wife said "We are English, we do not eat fruit with meat". Apparently his Dad found it so funny it stayed in his memory. And in the memory of 'im indoors as told me some years after his Dad had died. We still laugh about it.

As a teenager 'im indoors joined the Merchant Navy and literally went round the world and picked up food ideas which he cooked when he was home. Now normal but unheard of stuff in those days.
Keep smiling because the light at the end of someone's tunnel may be you, Ron Cheneler

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