Christmas Jokes

The light-hearted side of life
kevinchess1
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Christmas Jokes

Post by kevinchess1 » Thu Dec 01, 2016 9:30 pm

And why not
Here's todays Chestnut

Q What type of pizza does Good King Wenceslas like :?:
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Re: Christmas Jokes

Post by macliam » Thu Dec 01, 2016 10:02 pm

kevinchess1 wrote:And why not
Here's todays Chestnut

Q What type of pizza does Good King Wenceslas like :?:
I thought you weren't running a quiz? ;)
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Re: Christmas Jokes

Post by Chadwick » Fri Dec 02, 2016 8:30 am

kevinchess1 wrote:And why not
Here's todays Chestnut

Q What type of pizza does Good King Wenceslas like :?:
A: Deep and crisp and even!
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Re: Christmas Jokes

Post by expressman33 » Fri Dec 02, 2016 9:23 am

Why doesn't Santa have any kids?
He only comes once a year.


Whats the difference between the Christmas alphabet and the ordinary alphabet?
The Christmas alphabet has Noel.
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Re: Christmas Jokes

Post by macliam » Fri Dec 02, 2016 9:46 am

Ah, kev - wha've ye started.....

Q. Why is Father Christmas so jolly?
A. He knows where all the naughty girls live.

Q.What do you call someone who's afraid of Father Christmas?
A. Claustrophobic.

Q. What nationality is Father Christmas?
A. North Polish.
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Re: Christmas Jokes

Post by kevinchess1 » Fri Dec 02, 2016 1:55 pm

Chadwick wrote:
kevinchess1 wrote:And why not
Here's todays Chestnut

Q What type of pizza does Good King Wenceslas like :?:
A: Deep and crisp and even!
I never understand why you are so rubbish at the quiz


Deep PAN crisp and even!
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Re: Christmas Jokes

Post by kevinchess1 » Fri Dec 02, 2016 1:58 pm

jUDAS 'sTILL ALL RIGHT for tonight Jesus?'
JC '? What's happening tonight Judas?'
Judas 'The Last supper.'
JC 'The what?'
Judas 'Supper, supper, ordainary supper with the lads.'
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Re: Christmas Jokes

Post by 1960mackem » Fri Dec 02, 2016 2:29 pm

What's furry and minty?
A polo bear.

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Re: Christmas Jokes

Post by 1960mackem » Fri Dec 02, 2016 2:33 pm

Knock, knock
Who's there?

Arthur

Arthur who?
Arthur any mince pies left?

and one of my favourites

What did Adam say to his wife on the day before Christmas?

It's Christmas, Eve!

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Re: Christmas Jokes

Post by expressman33 » Fri Dec 02, 2016 2:33 pm

What’s the difference between Santa’s reindeer and a St George?

One slays the dragon, and the other’s draggin’ the sleigh.

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